Snail Mail - Bringing back the old school...

A while ago I posed a question on Facebook, "What has it meant for you to receive a cute, funny, and/or caring greeting card from someone in the "Snail Mail"? Especially when it wasn't expected." To my surprise, I had almost 30 people comment! (I haven't had that many comments on a post since I had a baby...)

Something about getting a card in the mail really struck a cord with people. Here are a few of the things that they had to say about it:

It made my day much better. I was pleasantly surprised, felt loved, thought about. And yes I saved every one of the cards, I pull them out occasionally when I'm not having such a good day.

Like someone not only cares, but considers me valuable and loved, that they would take the time to be creative and express that for me means more than words can express.

They are more special than 100 people saying "Happy Birthday" on FB. Because sending a card is "not as easy", there is a sense that there is more thought to it, and more caring in it.

Sending someone a card may seem like a trivial action, but I can assure you that it is not! My hope in this post is to inspire and equip you to become a Card-Writer; hopefully giving you ideas and tools to overcome obstacles like finding the time, and knowing what to write in a card.

How to Write a Card

These cards (above) are what I would refer to as "day brighteners" or "sending a smile". When I know someone I love is going through a tough time, in my mind I feel like sending them a random card like one of these is a perfect way to bring them a much-needed smile. That can be encouraging in of itself! You don't have to have the perfect, inspiring words to write inside - a simple "thinking of you", "sending a hug", or other short note of love and friendship will suffice to remind them that they aren't alone. (And yes, I will also share with you some other cards I have found for a variety of situations if you'd like one that is more specific.)

If you are hoping for some more help with things to write - I will share with you my own secret! I have this random little desktop calendar that has beautiful, encouraging verses and quotes on each page. This is where I find my own inspiration. I consider the friend, and the purpose for sending the card, and flip through until I find the perfect quote to write. I even have some of my favorite pages ear-marked so that I can find them easily. Then I write a simple, sweet, short, heart-felt note.

Bookstores, gift shops like Hallmark, and Amazon are retailers where you can be sure to find little books of encouraging quotes and verses to keep on hand.

Did you know that people have actually written books on how to write a card to someone? "Words to the Rescue: The sentiment guide for the tongue tied. 1000 thoughtful things to write on the card when you don't have a clue." That's one that I found on a quick Amazon search, and I've seen a few others out there.

"But isn't that cheating?!" You may ask. I suggest that it is not! For one, you don't have to copy everything word-for-word. The more often you reference these resources, the more likely you are to develop your own words and sense for how to express your thoughts. Besides, I can guess that the time and effort it takes for you to search a book or the Internet for a quote, verse, or other inspiration definitely "counts" in showing your love by the effort that you are putting in.

If you are a Pinterest person, I suggest starting a board and pinning quotes and/or verses to keep on hand. You can even use Google as a great resource.

I would also highly suggest that you check out this GREAT video on Sympathy vs. Empathy. (Do it - do it right now! It's only about 3 minutes long!) This is a video that Lindsey is using in her presentation in our workshop for how to talk with people who are going through challenges. It is a funny, but to-the-point video of awesomeness that will bring you understanding and help you avoid some phrases that can actually be kind of harmful, even though you don't intend that.

Another thing you can do is find a card that expresses the words for you. Sometimes it just takes someone who has walked that road to find the right words - and sometimes those people write cards because they know. I have occasionally found some good, serious, heart-felt cards like that at Hallmark. Etsy is a perfect resource for this - because shop owners on this site many times exist to "fill in the gap" for products (in this case cards for special situations) that you can't find elsewhere. Check out this one for a miscarriage:

This card brings tears to my eyes every time...

Anyhow, if I could finish this section with just one thought it would be this: "Don't let not knowing what to say keep you from sending that card." None of the quotes that I shared from my Facebook quotes said that it was the amazing, life-changing words that made the impact. It was the thought and effort that someone had put in to taking the time to send them a card in the mail. 

How to "find the time" to Send a Card

If this topic is one that "speaks to your soul", then my first suggestion is that you make it a priority to use some time to put together a card "kit".

Basically - have everything you need to get that card in the mail in ONE PLACE. Everything from the card, to the stamp, and all that you'd need in between. Here's a checklist for you:

• Cards (keep a variety on hand - don't necessarily wait for a need to arise to go buy one)
• Address book
• Pens
• Stamps
• Address labels
• Envelopes
• Stickers (add some fun embellishment)
• Quote book
• Gift cards (ie: $5 Starbucks - have a latte on me!)
• Encouraging mini cards to stick inside 
• Bloom Daily Planners has some pretty, neutral ones I love!
• Etsy has a great collection of mini verse cards 

If you take a little bit of time to put this together, it will save you a ton of time later on. Seriously, you could get a card completely done and ready within 5 minutes, and stick it in the mail. You may even have fun putting it together, and collecting the cards themselves. (I know I love it - going to Hallmark is a special treat for me!)

One of the convenient aspects of using a card to encourage someone is that it doesn't have to take a lot of time or money; and, if you keep some on hand, you can do it without leaving the house. This is especially helpful to busy mamas who usually find that their only free time is during naps, which leaves them tied to home and limits options. Naptime is the perfect time to grab your card kit and actually accomplish something to encourage friends! (If you'd like to write cards on a regular basis, you could even designate one naptime a month to writing cards, and then stagger putting them in the mail - for birthdays that are a couple weeks out, or several cards to a friend going through an extended challenging time.)

The "card kit" and scheduling card writing time are the two most-mentioned and relevant suggestions that I have come across. If I hear of other ways to make card writing easier I will let you know! (Or, if you have some, please comment.)

Okay, so let's end on some resources for buying cards:

• Hallmark
• I'm all for supporting this retailer, and my husband sometimes jokes that I help keep them in business! Most of the cards that I have sent, and shared at the beginning of this post, are the "Fresh Ink" brand. It seems like this brand is changing to "Studio Ink", from what I've noticed in recent visits. In all my searching, I haven't found another brand that has the super-random, funny cards like these. Unfortunately, prices at Hallmark are higher than other options.
• Target, Walmart, Grocery Stores, etc
• What is great about these places is that you can peruse the card section while you are shopping for other necessities; so it doesn't require a separate trip. I've also found some fun boxed sets of cute cards that are on the less expensive side.
• Hobby Lobby
• This store actually has a great little section of cute cards for only $.99. I've stocked up on  a couple of my favorites that are specifically for mamas.
• Trader Joes
• Another reason to love Trader Joes - cute cards for only $.99! The selection is somewhat limited, but they still cover most reasons you'd buy a card and the cards themselves are pretty and fun. 
• Etsy
• This is the BEST place to find cards for specific topics like adoption, miscarriage, infertility, divorce, etc. Just do a search for whatever situation fits. (You can also check out my post on simple support for infertility and miscarriage for other gift ideas that I have found from this site.)
• Marshalls, Ross, HomeGoods, etc.
• These kind of stores are great places to find boxed set of cards. The selection is more "luck of the draw", but I would definitely suggest checking out what they have if you enjoy shopping for "random finds". You can also score some pretty good deals. 
• Handmade cards
• If you have at least some skill, and the time to do it, handmade cards are also a wonderful option for expressing care for others. Again, Pinterest and Google are great resources for inspiration. And if you don't have the time, but love the sentiment behind them, chances are that you know someone who you can "commission" to make some cards for you. (And if you don't, I'd be happy to give a recommendation.)

Hobby Lobby

Etsy

Trader Joes

I hope that this post has inspired you to "bring back the old school"!

IF VIEWING ON MOBILE DEVICE:

To browse/search content, subscribe, or see all posts, switch to "view in web version" at very bottom of page.